"Getting" vs. "Receiving"

We produced a short video on Confession based on a script and VO by Dr. Ray Guarendi, and are thinking of doing a series of them as PSAs. You can watch the first one by clicking on the link at the top of the left column at NinevehsCrossing.com. In an email to our list I asked for feedback. Here's one comment and my response. If I don't make it clear below, I think A.S. is more right than I am. (SW)
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A.S. wrote:

Hello, Stan--

I wanted to respond to your invitation to let you know my thoughts regarding the video on Confession.

I think it’s excellent and inviting to all, especially those who have fear around this Sacrament or who, for other reasons, might have stayed away from it. It helps the viewer want to connect or reconnect with the Lord before he or she even gets to the confessional. The only thing that struck me in a negative way was the very last part when Ray said “...Confession is an opportunity to get God’s love, mercy, ...” Would it not be every bit as honoring of the Truth to say either “to know God’s love in an ever deepening way” or “to receive God’s love, His mercy, His forgiveness...” I don’t want to be theologically incorrect in any way. As a Catholic convert and therapist, I hear many former Catholics who didn’t receive the truth of the Gospel in love by way of their catechesis and therefore seemed to come away with the idea that it’s all about ‘what I do to get God to love me.’..I could be way off here—There’s just something about the word “get” used in conjunction with “God’s love” in the last sentence that, to me, feels like it almost wrecks all of the tremendous statements that went before.

Thank you for the wonderful job you do of making the Truth known through your apostolate.

God bless you,
A.S.

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Dear Ann,

Thanks very much for your excellent feedback on our Confession video.

Re: "get" vs. "know" or "receive".

I think you have a valid point. In our Common Ground DVD, Fr. John Riccardo clarifies to Pastor Steve Andrews that when we come forward for The Eucharist it's not so much about taking the body of Christ as it is Christ offering himself to us. (I may have the exact word wrong, but that was the sentiment.) In the same vein we need to be reminded that the sacraments are God's works, not ours. He is constantly giving, more so that we are "taking". God's common grace is ubiquitous to all. We are "recipients" a million over more than we could ever "take" or "get."

The other side of the issue is one of making clear the an important issue (of "getting" to Confession) and motivating people with clear language to do what they ought to be doing for their "own" good. Ray has a way with words, as you may know. He's able to connect with people's motivations. He's going to parse words on the human side of the issue. Using the word "get" in this instance, appeals to the human side of the relationship. Looking at it from God's perspective: God is giving and we're receiving. Looking at it from the sinner's perspective" we're taking and getting.

This reminds me of a conversation I often have with my wife about the use of certain words about human motivation in the process of justification-salvation, or works of charity... and the way a friend of ours positions the whole concept. D.G. is sort of a back-porch philosopher friend who is fond of pointing out that THE basic human need is personal survival. We think and do good and right things for others, he says, because ultimately they make us feel good, or they ensure us salvation. He's not arguing a works based salvation, but rather a basic human need that God has put into us. He'll say that altruism is not entirely selfless, acting altruistic protects us from eternal wrath. He says "You cannot give, help, or serve those in need unless you're alive and healthy enough to walk over and do the work in the first place." He argues that there's a point at which in general terms, taking care of oneself is more important than caring for others. His argument is not to engender selfishness, but to embrace the ability to serve and love one's neighbor. It's the reason the aid workers in destitute parts of the world are careful to get their vaccinations, food, and rest.

My wife doesn't like this argument, and I suspect theologians might not either. I can "get" their point. Most people would not appreciate the finer points of language, here. All they'd be interested in doing -- is "getting." Not good. Perhaps I'm just too selfish, but if the choice between hell and heaven wasn't constantly being dangled in front of me, along with the realization that I have to make hundreds of moral decisions everyday to ensure I "get" to heaven and not go to hell...well, who knows what I might do. My gut feeling as someone who isn't altruistic, nor am I someone who is always thinking of others -- is that I need to "get" to confession. I need to "take" a bath.

In the end I think "getting" and "receiving" are two sides of the same coin.

I'll pass this on to Ray...and the rest of the world, if they care.

Some very early morning thoughts.